Tag Archives: parents

Hey Anti-Vax Parents : Why Aren’t You Smoking?

So, I hear you’re an anti-vax parent?  Yes?  Wow, that’s interesting.

From what people tell me, you believe vaccines are useless at best, an express train to autism at worst, and you refuse to expose your children to such dangerous snake oil garbage?  So that’s true?  Ok.

Well, hey, how ya doin’?  Feeling clean, healthy… natural?  Great.

Look, I know we’ve had this chat before, and I got a little goofy with it, as I’m wont to do, but I want to ratchet up the seriousness and try this again, alright?  I want to approach this from a slightly different angle this time around.

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Shit That Needs to Stop : Anti-Vaccination Parents

As any regular reader here knows – I am not a parent.  While I know that typically forces me to recuse myself from any discussion even tangentially related to parenting – “you don’t even have kids” serves as a microphone-dropping debate ender for most discussions between parents and the childless – there are exceptions to the rule, especially when the matter at hand strays far from philosophy and nestles next to science and common sense.  Just like you don’t need to be married to correctly estimate that Ike Turner was not a good husband, you don’t need to have procreated yourself to have the ability to point out obvious errors in logic and reasoning among certain parents.

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Feline Nursing and Realizing I’m a Helicopter Parent

There was actually a beautiful symmetry to it.

In the first year after bringing my cat, Clifford, home from the shelter, I had a pretty substantial knee surgery, one that would leave me in a significant amount of pain and relegated to my couch for four days.  I learned in those days how supportive [read : unhealthily attached] Cliff was going to be – twice a day, he would efficiently combine his trips to his food dish, water bowl, and litter box in one loop, and then promptly jump back up next to me on the couch.  No looking out the window, no sleeping elsewhere – he was at my side 23.9 hours a day.

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Children and/or Friends

Here’s a disclaimer that will likely become obvious quite quickly : I don’t have children.

I hope to, someday, and I fully expect to look back at this, smile, shake my head, and smirk about how hopelessly clueless and naive I was.  Opinions are supposed to change as we grow and learn, after all, that’s kind of how the whole life thing works.  Knowing that your view might change, though, doesn’t invalidate today’s perspective.

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