Ah, America. The land of freedom and opportunity, including the opportunity to not even have to pull your fat ass out of your car to acquire your 1,500 calorie bag of grease. It’s an almost embarrassingly lazy practice – but it is so…damn…convenient. I indulge the urge to swing through and pick up an unhealthy payload more often than I should; then again, when you see the shitshow of humanity loitering about inside these fast-food joints, you remember it’s the lesser of two evils. The next time I can eat a meal inside a Taco Bell without a morbidly obese mother of three ADHD-inflicted children engaged in a heated relationship argument with her baby’s daddy on her rhinestone-encrusted iPhone 4 will be the first time.